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B o o k R e v i e w s
The Dance of Anger We live in an anger denying society. Yet anger within intimate relationships, is so common and one of the most difficult emotions to channel healthily. This is why I am passionate about the work of Harriet Lerner, PHD. Her book The Dance of Anger has become a mainstay for recommended reading in my office. So many have so much anger and yet so often I see a tremendous challenge in using this powerful energy positively in a bid to transform one’s life. The dark side is socially shunned. I say make peace with your dark side and transmute the energy into potential. Lerner teaches the reader this through various powerful case studies and examples of how to transmute anger and how to identify what part the reader is playing within their intimate relationships. Do we amputate people? Do we live in blame? Do we over function for others? Or do we under function and play the victim? I feel this book is ideal for women or anyone who puts their energy and focus into taking responsibility for other people’s feelings, thoughts and behaviours to the point of self annihilation, ultimately creating resentment and anger. When this paradigm is active, it becomes nearly impossible to change the dynamic of an unhealthy relationship. Lerner urges the reader to become self aware of one’s active, destructive patterns. I respect this book tremendously. It goes hand in hand with the somatic- emotional work we do in my office, where bodywork plus emotional processing often reveals and neutralizes the stuck and repetitive patterns that have acted as paralyzing agents in many people’s lives. Through this kind of awareness, a client can move beyond that which is keeping them in a life that is dissatisfying and off-purpose. I recommend The Dance of Anger to support a person’s journey out of destructive anger and into healthy intimate relationship with oneself and with others. The Dance of Anger by Harriet Lerner,PHD ISBN 0-06-091565-X (pbk)
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